Ok guys need a bit of parenting advice

[john s]

So my 14 year boy went back to school on Tuesday and he told us that a few kids and a girl. Are smoking weed at lunch break now these kids are only 14 for gods sake. Being quite a responsible boy he told us he wanted to tell a teacher. I know his school is big on this if you are getting bullied tell a teacher if you are getting called names tell the teacher. You see this and that tell a teacher. But I've told him to keep out of it if it doesn't bother you don't get involved. He is a good kid I said in a different situation you should intervene like if a girl or someone with learning difficulties was getting picked on yes. If they are getting weed of older kids I don't want my boy telling and getting found out and beaten up and known as a grass his school life. Even though my boy is not far from being a black belt at Teakwondo I don't want him getting into this kind of situation. Is what I said right? Just turn a blind eye and don't get involved or should he tell. And who the hell is selling weed to 14 year olds anyway.



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[eclipse1966]

tell him to slip an anonymous note to teacher. Regardless if it was pot or booze bringing that stuff to school is a bad idea IMO. There will be a time and place down the road but not at 14 and at school. On the other hand my wife says turn a blind eye. Who knows ???

So my 14 year boy went back to school on Tuesday and he told us that a few kids and a girl. Are smoking weed at lunch break now these kids are only 14 for gods sake. Being quite a responsible boy he told us he wanted to tell a teacher. I know his school is big on this if you are getting bullied tell a teacher if you are getting called names tell the teacher. You see this and that tell a teacher. But I've told him to keep out of it if it doesn't bother you don't get involved. He is a good kid I said in a different situation you should intervene like if a girl or someone with learning difficulties was getting picked on yes. If they are getting weed of older kids I don't want my boy telling and getting found out and beaten up and known as a grass his school life. Even though my boy is not far from being a black belt at Teakwondo I don't want him getting into this kind of situation. Is what I said right? Just turn a blind eye and don't get involved or should he tell. And who the hell is selling weed to 14 year olds anyway.



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[john s]

Thanks for your input it's actually a hard one I'm more bothered by some low life selling 14 year olds weed in the first place. I've been there and done it I was no angel growing up but 14 they are still kids. They don't need weed in there life's at that age.


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[lloydguy]

I am not a parent,so my advise might not mean as much as other's.
IMO,turning a blind eye is allowing it to continue or even become more common place.
I would follow eclipe's rout and leave an anonymous note as the principal's office.
It shouldn't change anything,but if these were grade 11 or 12 kid's,I would stay out of it.


And on the where did they get it from topic,yes your right Who TF is selling weed to 14 year old's?

 

[Pinner]

Tell your boy to mind his own business. ( a good life lesson)

Also, how do you guys know somebody is selling weed to 14 yr olds ?

 

[KermitZx6r]

Tell your boy to mind his own business. ( a good life lesson)

Also, how do you guys know somebody is selling weed to 14 yr olds ?

You think a 14 year old is growing it? Come on man, give your head a shake.

 

[Syclone74]

I'm with eclipse on this one. But kids will do what they want to. And I for one hope I've raised my girls right they're 11 and 13 and to do the right thing as I was no angel whatsoever. And don't want them doing what mom or dad did.

 

[whoDEANie]

It was around when I was 14 too. Where they got it, I have no idea. They were pretty harmless but also a pretty small group of people at the time. My initial instinct would be to just let it be. On the other hand, if it's more than just a small group doing it, I think I'd favor Eclipse's advice. My concern would be that they may be exposing other kids to it that would normally never even consider it - it becomes a lot more tempting to try when "everybody's doing it". While pot is pretty harmless to adults, I don't believe that to be the case for kids, particularly pre-teens.

 

[ferniesnow]

I would let it ride for a week or two. You guys that are thinking 14 year olds are too young to be experimenting need to give your head a shake and open your eyes. Lots of upper elementary kids and junior high students are introducing themselves to pot. I've called grade 5 and 6 students into the office and had a little chat about MJ. An eye opener, absolutely!

I would think that the teachers would find out as the smell of pot lingers and would be available to the teachers in the classroom. You can smell the residue for a long time afterwards and the teachers should be the first to know. Maybe they don't want to rattle the chains but surely there would be one ol' fashioned, responsible teacher remaining in the hallowed halls of learning.

 

[ZRrrr]

I was no angle either, but this does not belong at a school with children who may not know/understand it and be lured in by peer pressure.

I have to ask though....now that your kid has told you about this, why are you even considering this his responsibility to tell, leave a note or whatever. Why can't you as the parent make a call to the school? Even that could be anonymous but at least the administration would be aware of it and maybe keep an eye open.

 

[tex78]

My kids are in the same boat, heard there's is a group of kids 14 that smoke pot


Kids where home schooled for a few years, now going back to school...... Hope my 11 year old boy finds a good group and not a bad group

 

[whoDEANie]

I guess Fernie's right. Pot's not going anywhere. Informing the school is not going to stop them from doing it. On the other hand, if the school makes a big deal about it, some kids may be detoured from experimenting.

Lol, we should probably embrace it for what it is. ...a business opportunity.

 

[teeroy]

You think a 14 year old is growing it? Come on man, give your head a shake.

either getting from an older sibling or stealing it from their parent's stash would be my guess

 

[deaner]

That is a tough one. I would say you should call the school and talk to someone. That way you can ask that it stays anonymous, and you will know the info gets to the right people. Part of wants me to say you arent going to stop loser kids from smoking weed, but they could be really good kids being lead astray. Intervention at this point COULD help them. Maybe they are good kids and their parents have no idea they are doing it?

 

[linksys]

wow, wtf has our society turned into??

Your CHILD (yes a 14 year old is still a child), YOUR CHILD, who thankfully still looks at you, his Dad, for guidance and protection has come to you with a moral and legal issue - - and you are thinking of telling him to mind his own business??

He knows it's wrong. You know its wrong. What are you teaching him by doing nothing?

YOU, dad, need to take action on this - - and it can be done anonymously if you want to keep your child's name out of it. Call the principal your self. Be happy that your 14 year old still talks to his parents as many do not by that age. Show your child that you are a responsible parent and have his back.

Will it make the problem go away? Maybe/probably not. Will it make your child feel protected and comforted that his dad is willing to get involved? Yes!

Remember, this 14 year old came to you. It is not a case where you heard some kids were smoking pot and you were trying to get answers through him - - HE CAME TO YOU!

I don't care what you or I did as kids - - you are now supposed to be the responsible one.

BE THE PARENT!

 

[Bogger]

Not condoning it but 14 now is not what 14 was in the 70's.....

Lots of 14 year olds were smoking pot and drinking during my day, including me. by 14 (grade 10 for me) sex, drugs and alcohol were the weekend to-doo's and I'm pretty sure we were not the minority. I wasn't a horrible kid, I did well in school, held down a 25hr a week job but partied from time to time.

Our oldest (22 now) at 14 was popping extacy, smoking pot and doing god knows what else while disappearing for weeks at a time. She's turned out not too bad considering, works and lives on her own.
Our next oldest (19 now) was an honor student, but at 15 she was drinking at parties and I would not be surprized if she had some MJ from time to time. This didn't stop her from graduating with honors finishing her Civil Engineering Tech in 1.5 years and she is now living on her own with an awesome job in Calgary.
Our next oldest (16 now) is in my opinion "typical" not a drunk or a pot head but I caught her with pot at 15, have had to rescue her from the town fair in a drunken stuper etc.
Our youngest is now 12 and the only boy, not sure what to expect.

I don't think he should say anything, leave it up to the parents and teachers to find out and intervene, high school is a tough gig don't want to be labeled a rat. In the event of a bully situation or someone hurting another by all means speak up and intervene but that's not the case here.... Just because a kid smokes pot does not mean their life will be ruined

 

[neilsleder]

My neighbour kids smoke weed at the age of 14ish. They do it behind there garage which is along my drive way and it pisses me off. Cause A I go out side or have people over and that is all we can smell, and B my 14 year old step daughter gets introduced to it. I would like to say for your son to say something to the teachers but I don't think they will do anything. They will say they need to catch them in the act. So just tell your boy to stay away from it. I called the cops over my neighbour kids and they told me there is nothing they can do about, so I would think that there is not much a teacher could do either.


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[teeroy]

there is a factor here no one has mentioned, did the kid see them smoking pot, hear about it from other kids, or did the ones involved mention to the kid that they were getting high at lunch? sure you can alert the school as a parent thinking it will be anonymous regarding your son, but if he is one of a few that know because these kids are bragging about smoking pot then you may be opening a can of worms that cannot be undone. to be branded a rat or narc at a young age may have long reaching consequences for the kid. just puttin it out there.

 

[fidorama]

I am guessing its not hard for kids to get nowadays. I am no parent either, but when I recall when I was that age, and it was around. I think your advise was good, staying out of it is likely the best idea, although if he can pull it off anonymously maybe it be ok. I don't condone it in any way but pot is the least of the worries with all the crazy drugs out there now. As long as you keep the kid on the rite path, I think that's the best one can do.

 

[dogsmack]

My thoughts with telling someone goes to this, wander into the local police detachment and give them the heads up leaving everyone in the dark at the school. Who knows who is supplying who.

My daughter was a tough run during her early teen years with drugs, alcohol, eating dissorter and yes suicide. God love her she is coming around but the scars both mental and physical will be with her forever. What finally helped the ex wife and I steer her in a better direction was a drug test that she tested positive for METH of which she still to this day says she never did. Only thing I can come up with was the weed was laced (I don't even know if it can be done) but is was one hell of an eye opener to her and us. The world is a changing place and taking a back seat to "minding your own business" as Pinner so put is gone. Bare in mind "pinner" is something I use to roll when I was short or it was wheel chair quality. None of us are angels. The comment "minding your own business" tells me someone maybe worried they could have distribution interuptions and bothers me quite a lot. Offending anyone here is not my concern either. Drug abuse and its negitive side effects is everyones problem, for it to escalate it only needs a door to open. We as reasonablely responsible adults and parents need to close that door. Kids are our future and they maybe good kids that turn a blind eye but a drive by shooting or such does not discriminate (yes it is a bit on the extreme side but the potential is there).

The end of the day it is your son and your call, best of luck.