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Post Mortem It is true things happen in 3's Bin Laden; Ignatieff; and, Duceppe. Not a bad 36 hours!!

Bartender, i'll have a bin laden. What is that? Two shots and a splash of water

Remember it takes a college degree to fly a plane, but only a high school diploma to fix one....a reassurance to those of us who fly routinely in our jobs. After every flight, UPS pilots fill out a form, called a 'gripe sheet,' which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The...

Put a bunch of "No Crapping here" signs around your truck or stickers on your truck

For his birthday, little Joseph asked for a 10-speed bicycle.. His father said, 'Son, we'd give you one, but the mortgage on this house is $280,000 and your mother just lost her job. There's no way we can afford it.' The next day the father saw little Joseph heading out the front door with a...

Newfoundlander walks into a Nfld. library and says to the librarian, 'Excuse me Miss, I want a book on suicide.' To which she stops doing her tasks, looks at him over the top of her glasses and says, ' Fock off, you won't bring it back!'

Thank you for purchasing "Bubba & Cooter's Book of Saskatchewan Sure-fire Pick-up Lines" brought to you by Bubba & Cooter, straight outta the flats. Enjoy! 1) Did you fart? cuz you just blew me away. 2) Are yer parents retarded? cuz ya sure are special. 3) My Love fer you is like...

STEPHEN HARPER was visiting an Ontario primary school and the class was in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings. The teacher asked Mr. Harper if he would like to lead the discussion on the word 'Tragedy'. So our illustrious leader asked the class for an...

The price of Gas versus Printer Ink All these examples do NOT imply that gasoline is cheap; it just illustrates how outrageous some prices are.... You will be really shocked by the last one! (At least, I was...) Compared with Gasoline...... Think a gallon of gas is expensive? It is, but...

Choosing a wife A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money. The first does a total makeover. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new...

THE THREE LITTLE BEARS A far more accurate account of the events of that fateful morning.... Baby bear goes downstairs, sits in his small chair at the table. He looks into his small bowl. It is empty. 'Who's been eating my porridge?' he squeaks. Daddy Bear arrives at the big table and sits...

The 'Middle Wife' by an Anonymous 2nd grade teacher I've been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second grade classroom a few years back. When I was a...

You pick up a hitchhiker, a beautiful girl. Suddenly she faints inside your car and you take her to hospital Now that's stressful. But at the hospital , they say she is pregnant & congratulate you that you are going to be a father. You say that you are not the father, but the girl says you...

Two Newfies were waiting at the bus stop when a truck went past loaded up with rolls of turf. > > > > Jimmy said, “I’m gonna do dat when I wins da lottery…' > > > > “What's dat den?”asks Mikey. > > > > “Send me lawn away to be cut”…

While hiking down along the border this morning, I saw a Muslim extremist fall into the Rio Grande River ; he was struggling to stay afloat because of all the guns and bombs he was carrying. Along with him was a Mexican who was also struggling to stay afloat because of the large backpack of...

JENNY CRAIG FOR MEN A guy calls the company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program. The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck. She...

A magician named Don worked on a cruise ship. The audience was different each week so Don did the same tricks over and over again. There was only one problem: The captain's parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how Don did every trick. Once he understood, he started...

Subject: Cannibal A cannibal was walking through the jungle And came upon a restaurant operated by a Fellow cannibal. Feeling somewhat hungry, he sat down and looked over the menu.... Tourist: $8.00 Broiled Missionary:$10.00 Fried Explorer: $12.50 Backed Liberal or NDP politician...

The Veterinarian's Mom One Sunday, as he was counting the money in the weekly offering, the Pastor of a small church found a pink envelope containing $1,000. It happened again the next week! The following Sunday, he watched as the offering was collected, and saw an elderly woman put the...

If that was a truck it would have stock racks :eek: