Post your silly canadian winter jokes!

[Specks]

WINTER Poem

It's winter in Canada
And the gentle breezes blow
Seventy miles an hour
At thirty-five below.

Oh, how I love Canada
When the snow's up to your butt
You take a breath of winter
And your nose gets frozen shut.

Yes, the weather here is wonderful
So I guess I'll hang around
I could never leave Canada
Cuz I'm frozen to the ground!

Have a great day...





98% OF CANADIANS SAY "OH CHIT" BEFORE GOING IN THE DITCH ON A SLIPPERY ROAD.
THE OTHER 2% ARE FROM NEWFOUNDLAND AND THEY SAY, "HOLD MY BEER AND WATCH THIS."

 

[Specks]

Two young lovers go up to the mountains for a romantic winter vacation. When they get there, the guy goes out to chop some wood. When he gets back, he says, "Honey, my hands are freezing!"

She says, "Well put them here between my legs and that will warm them up."

After lunch he goes back out to chop some more wood and comes back and says gain "Man! My hands are really freezing!"

She says again, "Well put them here between my legs and warm them up."

He does, and again that warms him up.

After dinner, he goes out one more time to chop wood for the night.

When he returns, he again says, "Honey, my hands are really freezing!"

She looks at him and says, "FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, DON'T YOUR EARS EVER GET COLD?"

:d

 

[davelaw1982]

I heard this on kg country the other day on the morning show when it was about 35 below It's so cold out today even the kids at the mall are pulling their pants up!

I thought it was pretty good

 

[davelaw1982]

Two young lovers go up to the mountains for a romantic winter vacation. When they get there, the guy goes out to chop some wood. When he gets back, he says, "Honey, my hands are freezing!"

She says, "Well put them here between my legs and that will warm them up."

After lunch he goes back out to chop some more wood and comes back and says gain "Man! My hands are really freezing!"

She says again, "Well put them here between my legs and warm them up."

He does, and again that warms him up.

After dinner, he goes out one more time to chop wood for the night.

When he returns, he again says, "Honey, my hands are really freezing!"

She looks at him and says, "FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, DON'T YOUR EARS EVER GET COLD?"

:d

Hahaha

 

[Specks]

You Might Be Canadian If...
You bring a portable TV on a camping trip so that you don't miss Hockey Night.
You think -10 C is mild weather
You have twins named Wayne and Gretzky (alternately Gordie and Howe).
You know the ingredients for poutine.
You substitute beer for water when cooking

You've actually said, "Stay where yer at, 'till I gets where yer to."
You know what a toque is
You perk up when you hear the theme song from "Hockey Night in Canada."
"Eh?" is a very important part of your vocabulary, and is more polite than, "Huh?"
You've ever had your tongue frozen to something.
You have more kilometers on your snow blower than your car.
Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled in with snow.

You owe more money on your snowmobile than on your car.

 

[goodngrubby]

Why'd the snowman drop his pants?





































He heard the snowblower coming.:d